These are special messages to YOU directly from the band themselves. Don't you feel honored?
"I'll have a double waffle."
NC Waffle House, 9:30am
"One has to relentlessly beat up MTV until it changes its moniker. The M can no longer stand for music. Maybe "miscellaneous" or "misanthropic" or "mediocre" or the appropriate appellation, MONEY, but not music."
Bob Lefsetz, The Lefsetz Letter
What exactly does one do with this arm?
JR, on the logistics of cuddling
Don't let em' kick you in da' ding ding
Okay, what the hell is up with "wide spread" caps? Squezable jelly was perfect then somebody thought "hey, I know! We'll make the cap wider, that way people can just spread it without a knife! Durbledy hee hu hurrr!!!" Okay, first of all, that shit doesn't work. Anybody trying to spread jelly adequately without a knife (unless it's with your fingers on, say, somebody else's body) should be beaten with a baseball bat. Or at least a wiffleball bat. Secondly, what the hell? The thinner opening means the jelly disperses with minimal (at best) chunkage and texture... i.e. it's jam. The round cap was brilliant - it combined excellent chunk with minimal work and fuss. The new design is absolute crap and an affront to those of us who actually care. I'm boycotting it, and thinking about a letter writing campaign. In the meantime, anybody have an old round cap you'd like to send me?
A pessimist is a man who thinks everybody is as nasty as himself, and hates them for it.
G.B. Shaw (1856-1950)
Everybody wins! Well, everybody but you. You lose horribly. But I win!
Every time I watch the news it seems like a rerun of a show that I never really liked.